Why Men don’t listen and Women can’t read maps

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“Let’s look at the thoughts, attitudes, and emotions, as they’re experienced, in their very different ways, by men and women”. This is one of Allan Pease’s chirpy gear-changes in this provocatively titled book. Then he begins to ruminate: men and women live in the same world, but they experience it as if they came from two different worlds. Boys like things, girls like people. Every boy wants to be in a gang, and wants a gun; every girl has her best friend, with whom she shares her secrets. Men want status and power, women want love. It’s amazing, he concludes, that they can ever live together. Well, yes, and that living together is a pretty fraught business, though he doesn’t seem keen to go too deeply into that: this psychology, with its frequent allusions to research and its jokey little dramatisations, is upbeat feelgood stuff, which is why it’s made him such a fortune on three continents. “Listen to this!” he’ll say, then on comes an Aussie squabble, the woman berating a husband whose grunts proclaim the fact that he’s not listening. But to sell four million copies of a book about body language-in 33 different languages–means Pease and his wife Barbara must be getting something right. There are many scientifically-documented facts about the difference between the sexes, and Pease is selling them with a smile to an ever-growing public. You may be a contented member of that public, or you may find your hackles rising. It takes all sorts!

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